Appropriate uses for inappropriate words: A primer on language reclamation

Bitch. Faggot. Dyke. Tranny.

We've all heard these and so many other pejoratives, and we've all suffered from their use, whether directly or indirectly. We've probably even uttered a few ourselves from time to time. The sting felt from the receiving end of these epithets is one not soon forgotten, and can engender fear and resentment in their speakers' victims. However, there is one way to lessen the pain caused by these words: reclamation. A method often used by the feminist community (see Cunt), this involves taking a hurtful or harmful word and twisting its definition around to mean something positive and uplifting. It's really quite easy to do, and can be powerful in disarming those who seek to use language as a weapon against marginalized people. All it takes is three simple steps:

1. Pick your word. This should be easy enough, considering the many, many, many slurs to choose from. Once you've picked your favorite*, you can move on to:

2. Redefinition party! Well, it's less of a party, more of a deep inquiry into what the word is actually referring to based on comparing its modern usage to its original or alternative meaning. Because that's the thing about pejoratives: They have to have come from somewhere. You can't just make up a word and expect someone to be insulted by it. Call someone "Joobligoob" and you'll just get weird looks. Everything has an alternate, neutral-to-positive meaning that you can suss out if you take the time.

Take the word "fairy" for instance. Often used by heterosexual people to refer to gay men, it calls attention to the perceived effeminacy straight peeps expect to see in their gay male counterparts. But is that a bad thing? Effeminacy, both in dress and behavior, is simply a rejection of the strict heteronormative rules imposing "masculinity" upon men in our culture, thereby freeing the effeminate man to decide for himself what is normal, what is masculine, what makes him a man. Therefore, being a fairy simply means taking your life and your expression of yourself into your own hands, whether or not society approves of that. I'd say that's quite a brave and radical feat, and one worth taking full ownership of!

3.This is where it really gets good: Turn the weapons against the tyrants wielding them. Next time someone calls you a [insert word here], say, "Thank you! It's so nice of you to acknowledge that I'm doing my part in dismantling the system of oppression that keeps me and other [insert marginalized group here] down by simply being who I am, which is apparently noteworthy enough for you to comment on it!" With a huge smile on your face. Because you see, if you do that, the word loses all its pejorative value, leaving the bigots with one less way to keep you scared shitless, and that's exactly what needs to happen in order for full social equality to be achieved.

There are some pitfalls to this, though: if the word loses too much of it's meaning, it could relapse into nastiness again (see the ups and downs the word "bitch" has gone through); when the bigots are running out of epithets, they could start weaponizing previously neutral words (see "homosexual" and "gay," for two good examples); and above all, context is key. You can't bring your shiny new reappropriated word into a space where it's still an insult and not expect an uproar. Also, if you are not a member of the marginalized group the reclaimed word refers to, DO NOT EVER refer to someone of that group as that word without EXPLICIT permission first. Whether or not you intend to cause harm is not the point; the point is that you need to use sensitivity and know when you can and can't use it. General tip: when you're in public (and that includes social networking sites' public content) refrain from using any potentially offensive language. I'm assuming you know all this already, considering that you're a decent human being (I hope), but I figured I'd get it down in writing so I can point to it and say "You can't say I didn't warn you!" So there.

I wish y'all the best of luck in dismantling the status quo, one word at a time. Have fun!

*and by favorite, I mean the one you find to be the most repulsive and demoralizing, of course.